Comments on: I have a friend who says he can’t cry — are there medical conditions that stop people from crying?

By: Tania

Tania — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 03:38:41 +0000

Hi,

Learning more about depression has opened my eyes to a few things. From the mouth of people who have clinical depression and accept it, they have said that depression is not a constant state of sadness but instead, a state of not being able to feel anything at all.

Remember that being depressed does not always mean that something so bad happened to you that you are always sad. It also means that there may be a chemical imbalance in your brain and problems just add to it. Also, having problems and realizing that you can’t feel anything or can’t cry when you probably should be can be devastating, adding more to the depression. (I bet you can see the vicious cycle here)

By: Tania

Tania — Sun, 16 Aug 2009 17:49:28 +0000

“Strong emotions cause our brains to release chemicals that indirectly lead to teary eyes.”

Is there not a part of the brain that can be damaged when someone can’t cry? For example, maybe the chemical-releasing part of the brain that causes tearing when you feel a strong emotion can be releasing the chemicals/hormones/neurotransmitters at the wrong times or not at all. I find this likely for those who do not have depression or Post-traumatic Stress Disorder.

For those who do or used to have a stronger degree of Depression, it’s like Diabetes. When you have an onset of diabetes (after birth) or as an adult)the insulin receptors/releasers in the body are damaged because you probably had too much sugar and your pancreas stopped being able to filter sugar properly. For depression or any emotional disorder, the inability to cry and crying at the wrong times may come from having cried too much which may have caused the receptors/releasers in the brain to be damaged just like in Diabetes.

(Sorry if I’m contradicting myself or make no sense or am giving the wrong info; please correct me)

For those who think that you don’t have depression and feel that you just do not have the reasons to cry because you know “that you have lived life, and that there are other things bigger than break ups and deaths,” you might actually be desensitized to emotion and are not interested in things much/don’t feel things like most people (apparently) do. You can still be happy and might be content with how you feel now, but you might remember that earlier in life, you either felt really bad and, at that point, decided that you never needed to cry again or, you never actually cried.

I say all of this because, like all things that happen to people, it’s either psychological or physical.

I hope you all can get some sort of help because even if it does look pathetic, crying is the best thing one can do to renew one’s spirit and energy, and clear one’s mind in order to make good decisions.

Good luck to all!

By: anonymous

anonymous — Thu, 06 Aug 2009 00:41:36 +0000

hey okay so i havent been able to cry in forever! i used to take medicine for depression and im so afraid that it has enabled me to cry. i took the medicine becuase my father abused me emotionally and physically and i havent cryed ever since ive seen him which was two years ago. well ok thats not entirly true. i can only cry when i see things about abuse.. ANYWAYS so i was watching this commercial and supposidly there are eye drops that can trigger the chemicals in your brain to make you cry. but just ask your eye doctor.. there is still hope!

By: Debbie

Debbie — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 14:44:18 +0000

I was on here to see why my co-worker doesn’t cry, then I read Alexis’s post. I’m so very sorry that nobody helped you. I’m sorry that it broke you. I hope you can find healing. You were only trying to do the right thing. I pray you find your joy again.

By: sue

sue — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 02:37:57 +0000

I have not been able to cry for over 5 years. Am 62 years old. Separated about 5 years ago from husband of 40 years. Divorced 2 years ago-could not cry then or at deaths in the family or any other loss. I feel that I want to cry, that it would make me feel better. May get a little misty but cannot break down and have a good cry. Doctors and even a psychiatrist don’t seem to think it’s a problem, but I do. This is the first place I have seen other people have the exact same problem and possible reasons. I take anti-depressants and they seem to help somewhat.

By: alexis

alexis — Sun, 26 Apr 2009 06:16:50 +0000

i used to be extremely depressed and cried more than once every day… my parents were big drug addicts and unlike my other family members who didnt want to get involved i did. tho i no i shoudnt have i always opposed their drug use and would scream at the top of my lungs and swear at them… i called the cops and dcfs on them (they didnt do much infact yelled at me) but as i did this my dad would act abusivley towards me thus i became depressed and after my dad hurt me so bad it made a scar i cried like no other i screamed tears but after that never did i cry again… later my dad samshed me against the door in the closet all i did was louagh… i am an extremely cold person i think terrible thoughts like wishing death on my mother because then i would inherit everything i try to control my thoughts but its really hard and i donnt want to think like that but i really cant help it…. well anyway i dont cry anymore because i think i have had my share of pain and tears so i guess i dont need to cry anymore nothing is painful enough for me to waist m time and mope nothing is that special to me anymore… kinda sad isnt it… even my own brothers death i didnt even get sad hhmmpphh

By: Jean Smythe

Jean Smythe — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 02:20:39 +0000

I had the most difficult time crying after my son was killed. Yet, when I would go to this very kind dentist for a simple exam (painless)…I would be weeping. I cry at inappropriate times and only certain people seem to cause me to be able to cry.
Its a horrible tense *feeling* not being able to cry.
Whenever I am able to shed just a few tears,its a wonderful feeling of relief and relaxation that all the tranquilizers in the world just cannot duplicate. I hope you can help people like all of us who have such difficulty crying. I am certain we will live longer &more happily, too.

By: Andrew

Andrew — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 06:42:39 +0000

I haven’t cried over anything in just under nine years. Not sure if it’s due to depression or a mental block placed upon myself for seeing crying as a weakness. I do wonder about it though, and wonder why it is that no matter how bad things get, who dies, or whatever, I can’t shed one tear.

By: Jessica

Jessica — Sat, 28 Feb 2009 08:26:18 +0000

For quite long, I’ve been crying almost everyday. When I wake up and when I go to sleep or sometimes even after lunch (personal reasons)

I don’t think I’m depressed or anything… That time I prayed to God that I want to stop crying. Now that He granted my wish, I couldn’t help but feel different. I cry when someone insults me, or when someone dies, when I feel pity, or when I watch dramatic endings. Its just funny that I can’t. Maybe some physical condition caused this but I couldn’t point out what.

My heart is really clenching so bad with a story that I’m currently reading. My eyes burn and I can barely breathe, but I can’t cry.

By: mick

mick — Wed, 28 Jan 2009 19:28:17 +0000

I havent cried for 4 years. And no matter what shit happens I just cant cry anymore. I went through a phrase prior to this 4 years of dry spell where I used to cry everyday. The tears were so uncontrollable they just flowed out whenever i feel sad. they were so hard to control. Then after that, I just stopped crying altogether. No matter how hurt or sad I was, all i can feel is a tightness in my chest. Nothing more.